With domestic violence awareness month, October, steadily approaching there is a greater push for mindfulness of the issue and San Diego Mesa College has a variety of resources to help students who are affected by domestic violence.
Domestic violence is when one partner acts in an abusive manner toward the other partner in an intimate relationship or marriage.
Domestic violence crosses gender lines, can affect any age range and doesn’t care about ethnicity. It impacts straight and gay relationships, either partner in the relationship can be the abuser and at times other family members are also physically or emotionally abused.
The behavior associated with domestic violence includes physical, sexual, verbal and other emotional abuse. The main goal of the abuser is always to gain and maintain total control over their victim.
Mesa College has health professionals, counselors and psychologist available at the Health Services department. Police are also available to help victims of domestic violence. For physical violence, the physician and nurses on campus can mend and heal, but for the emotional turmoil brought on by domestic violence psychologist are ready to help.
Typically the abuser creates a deep rooted sense of emotional manipulations before any physical abuse ever occurs. With this emotional handcuffing a victim who only seeks physical help and not emotional or psychological help will be at a greater risk of returning to the abuser.
There is a huge misconception that a person who is in a real domestic violence relationship wouldn’t stay in the relationship, and thus when a victim returns to the relationship it’s proof that it “isn’t that bad” or the victim is “allowing it.”
Generally the victim sees him or herself as having no choice but to return to the abuser. The abuser will typically remove associations with friends and family, lower the victim’s self-esteem and at times cause or worsen depression issues.
It’s important to note that every relationship is unique and domestic violence takes on many forms; while some situations consist of verbal and emotional abuse (or none physical actions), others become quite physically violent where the victim is beaten and sometimes raped.
Statistically women are six times more likely to become victims of domestic violence, but due to a greater stigma of men (both straight and gay) being seen as victims of domestic violence it is thought that few incidences are actually reported.
According to the San Diego Domestic Violence Council website about 50 percent of all lesbians have experienced or will experience domestic violence.
There are many signs to look out for if you think you might be in an abusive relationship; including your partner having a history of bad relationships or a violent past, he or she always blames others for their problems, blaming you for the violence, coercing the use of alcohol or drugs, acting controlling or manipulative, keeping you away from close friends and family, and talking about others in a sexual or derogatory manner.
Relationships shouldn’t make you feel less confident about yourself, they shouldn’t scare you or keep you in a constant state of worry, they shouldn’t change your behavior in a negative way and they shouldn’t make you feel afraid of discussing problems with your partner.
Campus Rescores:
Police emergency line
619-388-6405
Health Services department
619-388-2774
Events :
Rape Aggression Defense Basics Self Defense Training.
Held on Oct. 8 and Oct. 15 in room Q-100 from 8 a.m. to 3:30 p.m.
To register contact Cindy Cavada by phone at 619-388-2749 or by e-mail at ccavada@sdccd.edu.
Hope in the Park
Held on Oct. 8 at Blaboa Park from 1 p.m. to 7 p.m.
There will be live music, food, games, community resources, food packages, contests and the organization is providing methods of healing for those affected by domestic violence, education about prevention and much more.